Beyond the Moving Boxes: Creating Global Confidence in Your Children

How we helped our daughters find belonging and adventure through multiple international transitions

Apr 06, 2025

That first week in Doha was brutal. My six-year-old Elise sobbed for her forgotten teddy bear, and seven-year-old Mia kept asking when we were going "home." The mom guilt was overwhelming.

Fast forward eight months, and these same children confidently navigate their international school, switch effortlessly between cultures, and eagerly anticipate discovering new places. What changed?

We learned that children don't just adapt to change—they can thrive when they're part of creating it.

Through our family's moves from England to Denmark (where Mia was just 8 months old), back to England (when Mia was 4 and Elise was 2), and finally to Qatar (with Mia at 7 and Elise at 6), I've discovered that involving children in the journey transforms them from passive passengers to active adventurers. When we let them participate in meaningful ways, their natural resilience flourishes.

Here are the strategies that turned our children's tears into excitement—approaches we refined with each international move.

Get them involved!

Create a Moving Adventure Book

When we were preparing to move back to England from Denmark, our daughter Mia was approaching 4 years old and beginning to understand what it meant to leave one home for another. Instead of minimizing her concerns, we channeled her energy into curiosity.

We bought a colorful scrapbook and started our "London Adventure Journal." We would research something new about our destination—London parks, the big red buses she'd get to ride, famous attractions, and fun activities for children.

"Mia became so invested in filling those pages that she started telling everyone about 'her' London adventure," my husband laughed. "She went from asking endless questions to being our family's London expert."

The journal became both an information source and a treasured keepsake. Years later, she still pulls it out to show friends how much she's learned since those first impressions.

Try this: Start a physical or digital collection where your child gathers information about your destination country. Include maps, flags, famous landmarks, typical foods, animals, and other points of interest.

Allow Ownership Through Choices

Children lose so much control during an international move. Acknowledging this reality led us to create decisions they could own within the larger change intentionally they couldn't control.

Before our move to Qatar, we involved our girls in decisions like:

Which special toys would travel in their personal suitcases (they each got to fill one backpack with non-negotiable comfort items)
Which new clothes they wanted for Qatar's climate and culture (we researched appropriate options online together)
Which new foods they wanted to try first (create a "taste adventure" checklist)
What would be our first family outing in our new country

When Elise chose her new wardrobe specifically for Qatar's climate and culture before we arrived, those clothes immediately became personal expression in a new environment. Having pieces she had personally selected gave her a sense of identity and control in our hotel living situation. "My Qatar clothes," she called them proudly, creating ownership over this new chapter in her life.

Try this: Identify 3-5 meaningful choices your child can make within the moving process. Document their decisions and follow through, showing them their voice matters even during big changes.

Create Continuity Bridges

"Will we still have pancake Saturdays in Qatar?" Mia asked, her voice showing genuine concern as we prepared for our move from England.

That question highlighted an important truth: children need continuity bridges—familiar elements that bridge the gap between their old life and their new one.

We carefully identified family traditions, routines, and objects that would remain constant:

Our Saturday morning pancake tradition
Bedtime reading routines (same books, same order)
Weekly video calls with grandparents
Special holiday traditions

These consistent elements became anchors amid the sea of change. When everything felt foreign and new, the comfort of familiar routines helped our children feel safe.

For our move to Doha, we created special digital memory collections on Mia and Elise's iPads – curated albums filled with photos and videos of cousins, family members, favorite toys, their old school, friends, and places they used to visit and play. When homesickness hit either of them, the iPads would come out, and they'd scroll through these visual reminders of their connections and experiences. These digital memory boxes became powerful tools for maintaining continuity of identity even as everything around them changed.

Try this: Help your child identify and plan for elements of continuity. Create a visual "Same and Different" chart where they can see that while many things will change, important aspects of their life will remain constant.

Address Fears with Facts and Preparation

Children's fears about moving abroad often stem from uncertainty. I learned this lesson when preparing Elise and Mia for their new school in Qatar.

Instead of offering vague reassurances, we took concrete steps to transform the unknown into the familiar. We arranged to visit the actual school before they started, walking the hallways together and peeking into classrooms. We traced the route they would take each morning, identified the playground where they would have recess, and even located the cafeteria where they would eat lunch.

"This is where you'll line up each morning," I explained, watching their eyes widen as they began to visualize their new routine. "And this is the art room where you'll have class on Tuesdays."

What made the biggest difference was connecting with families already living in Doha. We arranged meetups where the girls could ask other children questions about their experiences—questions they might not have felt comfortable asking adults. Hearing directly from peers that "the pizza at lunch is actually pretty good" or "the playground has the coolest climbing structure" made the transition feel real and manageable.

We also:

Drove around our new neighborhood, identifying familiar reference points like parks, grocery stores, and ice cream shops
Role-played scenarios like ordering food or meeting new friends
Watched videos of children in daily life in Doha

By showing them that Qatar was a real place with real children doing the same things they enjoyed—playing, learning, making friends—we helped demystify the experience. The strange became familiar before we'd even fully unpacked.

Knowledge replaced fear with preparation. By the time they started school, the experience felt like stepping into a story they'd already begun rather than a completely foreign world.

Try this: Identify your child's specific concerns and address each with concrete visits, introductions, and preparation activities whenever possible. Don't dismiss fears—transform them through direct experience and practice.

Create "Saying Goodbye" Rituals

The most challenging parenting moment in our moving journey came when Mia and Elise had to say goodbye to their friends in England as we prepared for Qatar. The pain on their faces was unbearable, and I questioned every decision we'd made.

I realized then that meaningful goodbyes aren't something to rush through—they're essential to processing change in healthy ways.

Before leaving England, we created intentional farewell rituals:

Visited all their favorite places and took photos to create a memory book
Hosted a "see you later" party (avoiding the finality of "goodbye")
Created a shared digital photo album where friends could continue adding pictures

These rituals acknowledged the significance of the relationships they were physically leaving while creating paths for those connections to continue in new forms.

Try this: Help your child plan meaningful ways to honor important relationships and places. Focus on transformation rather than termination—how connections will change rather than end.

The Unexpected Gift of Global Childhood

Last week, my daughter's teacher pulled me aside at pickup. "Mia has this incredible ability to make everyone feel included," she said. "She's the first to welcome new students."

That night, I asked Mia about it. "Well," she said, matter-of-factly, "I know what it feels like to be new."

What I once feared might damage my children has become their strength. Through our multiple international moves, they've developed extraordinary empathy, adaptability, and cultural intelligence—gifts that will serve them for a lifetime.

The journey hasn't been perfect. There have been tears, difficult adjustments, and moments of homesickness. But by involving our children as active participants rather than passive passengers, we've watched them develop resilience and confidence that continually amazes us.

Your children can thrive through international transitions, too. The key isn't shielding them from the challenges of change but equipping them to navigate those challenges alongside you—as part of your family's shared adventure.

What are your concerns about how your children might handle an international move? Or if you've navigated transitions with your children before, what strategies worked for your family?

Share your thoughts in the comments below.